Monday, August 16, 2010

Tomorrows going to suck.

Okay well today i binged and purged, as i said i would... *sigh* I feel like a phony! After everything i said in my last 2 posts, i ignored them and just binged...God i suck, but after this post I'm going to exercise like mad and tomorrow I'm going o fast.
Tomorrow i have to wake up at 6:30 (its 1:38am right now) and i have to babysit three kids, which i already wish i could change my mind about. But it will make fasting easier i suppose... babysitting from 7 - 3:30 go to the grocery store after wards and buy some slimquick drink mixes, and then come home and most likely sleep!
I'm going to be so damn moody tomorrow and not in the mood to watch three little kids, they better not expect me to run laps with them because my plan is to chill the fuck out.

As you can see, i am already in a bitchy mood. I get like this after a binge and purge. After some exercise i will feel a bit better. yuck yuck yuck! Tomorrow will be better i swear, I haven't slipped up lately so i just have to keep telling myself that. I also have to remember not to make a habit out of this like i did before, but 1 binge in almost a week is way better then 3 times every day. Think positive Cass, think positive. It's hard though, just knowing i failed when i said i wouldn't! I officially quit smoking weed. I mean it. Both times i said i binged on this blog it was due to smoking weed. Well, Tomorrows a new day, I'm going to fast, not smoke weed anymore, and i will be back on track, i just have to forget about my last binge, whats done is done, i can reverse the damage by working my ass off from now on.

Ugh I'm excited but also not for tomorrow. I need to sleep. But first TREADMILL and WEIGHTS!

Tomorrow i will probably be like 100-101lbs, mostly from being bloated (I hope). Not sure if i will weigh myself tomorrow though, maybe before bed which i usually don't do. But i will probably only get like 3 hours of sleep tonight and i like to weigh myself when i wake up after a good 8-9 hours or more and after my morning wizz. You know how it is.
So i may have to put it off a day, which will probably be for the best anyways...

She throws up whatever she eats, She leaves the bathroom with a nose bleed.


Aurélia said...

I'm so jealous, I'm 5''5, but you look gorgeous! Your bones are beautiful and so defined! I'm also trying to kick my b/p habit. I wish you the beast of luck dear, and please promise me you'll be careful!

Sosic said...

Hhahaha awe thanks.
But blah, as you can tell from my last post i cant agree with you about my body lol.
I'm sure you look fucking great and gorgeous! and blah binging and purging is the worst habit to get out of! I NEVER thought it would be this hard.

Good luck to you too! Message me sometime to let me know how your doing or something!
And thanks I promise i will try and be careful, you be careful too!
See ya :)


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